Bloggin' fool.

So, I just finished The Great File Reorganization of 2005 at the day job. It's been a two-day project in which I have lovingly indulged my OCD (though admittedly I did not get all reverse-chronological on top of my alphabetical, much as it pained me... didn't want to hunch over the drawer for weeks). A few things I learned:

1. Both of my Editorial Assistant predescessors have a feeble grip on the alphabet. Therefore, by comparison, I rock. I hope to bring this up in my annual review.

2. There is not much to do when you get that long-term project off your back and you're in the doldrums of your editorial cycle.

My solution to Friday boredom? McSweeney's Internet Tendency! This particular list caught my eye:

Things You Would Say
if You Had a Time Machine
and Lots of Financial Problems

BY LYNETTE CAIN

- - - -

Now my check won't bounce!

That generic cat food caused my future cat to have future explosive diarrhea.

I left my wallet in 1488, but I might have some ducats in my other pair of pants.

We start having sex unless you promise to pay me $63,248.71 in child support later.

I've got to stop myself from majoring in Brit Lit.

My stupid HMO doesn't cover post-existing conditions.

Oh crap, I forgot there are debtors' prisons in 1736.

Thank God President Oprah is going to raise the minimum wage.

When did I leave that secured-credit-card application?

I'd go back and invest money in the past if only I could afford gas for my time machine in the present.

- - -

I would also add: I shouldn't buy these shoes. Yes, they're on sale, but they'll pinch my toes later and it's not worth the credit card debt.