14 October 2005

baseball baseball baseball, I made you out of clay...


In recognition of the just-ended Jewish High Holidays, I'd like to take a moment to write something about the Red Sox.

It's related. I swear.

As was brought to my attention by the very nice Mr. (or Ms.) Kaspit of Quicksilver, the 2005 Boston Red Sox had three (count 'em, 3) members of the Chosen on the roster. They later apparently made history (I think) by all playing in the same game at the same time. Three Jews, one diamond, endless possibilities.

Those three mensches are Gabe Kapler, Adam Stern, and Kevin Youkilis. Kapler, you may remember, has a year or more to recover from his Achilles tendon injury and will not likely return to the Red Sox (he's unsigned after the '05 season). Stern's fate is anybody's guess as he's mostly PawSox fare, as far as I know. The people, they love Youk, the most patient hitter in baseball, so we could see him manning first or third in '06. He sorta gets my vote for a regular position, despite being a creepy drunken feature on On The DL's Not-So-Blind items. He is Euclis, Greek God of Walks. Also, apparently, the Greek God of Hideous Shirts. Youk, darling, if you lay off the raver section of H&M and the Boston-equivalent of Murray Hill girls (scratch that, I'm gonna go ahead and say you should just flat-out not accompany Mr. Foulke when he's out tomcatting around... you might contract something icky), we could have a beautiful future as position-player and devoted fan. Mark my words.

As a full-blooded Red Sox fan and honorary Jew I'm delighted by the Sox and their Tribal affiliations (Dominicans and Jews! Sweet! Though we've lost a lot of Dominicans lately, I guess... stupid Mets). They missed the frickin' bateau on the Jackie Robinson thing, so they might as well pick up some points somewhere. Not that it's the same thing.

image from lidsforyids.com

1 comment:

J said...

If my third base playing days were any indication, Jews are excellent baseball players.