01 March 2006

"Also because I am huge."

Red Sox Opening Day is just over a month away, and though I have been distracted by soccer of late, I'm still pretty excited for the warmer weather, longer days, and wrenching anxiety of the baseball season.

One of my favorite things about spring training is the gads of photos the Boston Globe and the AP take of the players as they warm up, pitch, take BP, sneeze, etc.

One such gem, from boston.com, is this one of David Ortiz talking to a couple of Sox rookies:

Aren't they so little and cute next to Big Papi?

And, to take up Toby's complaint about stupid-looking uniforms, I saw the USA's WBC jersey for the first time today, as worn by Sox captain Jason Varitek:
The fuck is that? The S-curve of stripes? Really? Must the flag really be bandied about on effing everything? Proud as I am to have the right to shoot first and wiretap later, choose from a billion salad dressings at the grocery store, and eat myself into hypertensive oblivion from the comfort of my own Hummer, I really don't want my baseball team going out there looking like a bunch of Madison Avenue - created nancyboys. Which is, incidentally, what they're going to look like. I mean, we may very well get our butts kicked by "Dominicana," Cuba, and Venezuela... there's no need to take the field having handed your dignity in once you got dressed. Listen. Give me a flag during the game and I'll wave it. I will. I'll tie one to Gus's tail. But there's no need to invoke Old Glory everywhere. There's a patch, you see... right there on the sleeve. The terrorists do not win if you just put "United States" or "USA" in an attractive, simple typeface on a nice white jersey. AND LEAVE IT AT THAT.

Tobs has already given them the business for the stupid hat, so I'll leave my comments to this: It looks as though the Astros had a hat-surplus and the MLB, in an effort to save money, did some "creative" restitching.

Sorry 'Tek. Your uniform sucks. Even the Netherlands' BP jersey is cooler. The Netherlands!

It's just funny that, as the country that invented the sport, we have the feeblest grasp on a good-looking, classic baseball uniform. It would make sense if we had stupid-looking soccer uniforms. Odd that we don't.

Now, it's Red Sox (ridiculously easy) quiz time:

Who knows the origin of the quote that is my headline?
Bonus question: What song do they play at Fenway when he (who spoke those words) comes up to bat?

Yeah... even if you don't care, I'm gonna tell you later!


claire said...

oh i know i know!! it was big papi himself! when asked why people called him big papi (he likes it, and that's the song), he said something about something and then said, also because i am huge.

was i right? what do i win?

Sheena said...

You win.... a: Brand. New. Juicer!!!!

Big Papi's song is "I Like it When You Call me Big Poppa" or whatever that Biggie song is.

Well done Claire.

tobs said...

the netherlands can't even spell their own country's name right. well, one of its names. i can see how they'd get confused, actually.

Sheena said...

That's what makes it cool. It's spelled in Dutch, AND it's orange.

William of Orange, Tobs. So cool