It would seem that we're entering the part of boyfriend season when the mating dances are performed. Just when I thought it was safe to cease creepily reading about people with whom I attended high school (who now have spouses and children and are working on higher degrees and probably also have mortgages) and log out of StalkSpace, True.com hits me yet again with a remarkable bit of advertising.I can't embed it, but I did find a permanent (I hope) link for your viewing horror. Go have a look...I'll wait.
....Ok. Did you give your eyeballs a good long soak in some lye? So, let us review together. "Jakeluv" is alone. In his bedroom. He appears to have "arty" posters of musicians behind his stereo. You are given the impression that he wants to talk to you. We know this because he lights a candle and dances.
Alone.
In his bedroom.
To the camera.
And then, the thing de la resistance, he points at you. You! You're the one he wants.
So why don't you talk to him? lol!
As Tobs might say, gentle fuck. Really? I don't think I really need to go into the necklace that swings as he cavorts about, nor the rapist/Matt Clement chin beard.
This is just insulting. Am I meant to find this appealing? Why, in the name of God would any reasonable woman ever be turned on by watching a strange man dance alone in front of his webcam? Creepy-wise, this is the Internet equivalent of being ground up on by a strange dude on a dance floor.
Which leads me to an anecdote from the weekend: Some strange dude came up to me from behind on the dance floor at a bar in Northampton. I believe he was desirous that we share a bump and grind. His fatal error was skipping past the conversation in which he asked my permission to approach me from behind and press his body against mine. I was therefore forced to elbow him in the chest (he was a bit shorter than I am), which sends the very clear "No touching!" message. You'll be pleased to learn that I managed not to spill my Dogfish Head 60 Minute IPA during this maneuver.
4 comments:
i'm not sure that link is still pointing where it was when you started. i don't think that guy can even move, let alone dance alone for the internet to see.
Dammit. You're right. He's just sitting in front of his computer, presumably resting his groove thang.
Hmm... foiled again by those folks at True.com. I'll see if I can find it someplace else.
hardcore. and didn't spill a drop. you're either very talented, or an alcoholic. or a very talented alcoholic. or some fourth thing.
...hope you didn't bruise your elbow.
I'm going with the former.
*hic*
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